I want to give up. I want to wash my hands and go tomy mom's house. I want safety and security, and not have to find a job ever again. I am tired, and i am thinking in a downward spiral. I wonder if Vancouver is where i ought to be. I wonder where exactly i ought to be. The Lord always spoke so clealy to David. Or, that's how it seems in Samuel. David inquired of the Lord, and He justr answers, just like that. I feel like i have done a lot of inquiring...yet i hear no answer. It causes me to ask myself if i reallly am truly a seeker of Gos's heart. My instinct is to run away. I don't want to go out today, with my smile, and my mascara, and my resume. I am sick of trying to sell myself. I know that i am a hard worker, and loyal, and fun. I have experience, and everything. I have applied at a lot of places, and yet, i have no takers. I don't get it. Lord, i don't understand!